Welcome to Monday Matchup, where we select one random combination of cards included with the digital version of SUPERFIGHT to give you a small taste of the sort of ludicrous creatures you'll be arguing for and against. Today, we're highlighting a combination that includes America's 14th President, a legion of the Arctic's most deadly flightless birds, and arms barely long enough to reach a stove-top hat: It's Abe Lincoln Leading an Army of Peguins with Tiny T-Rex arms!
As a leader of the American people, Abe Lincoln earned a reputation as a wise, compassionate President who's name would be etched into our nation's historic tapestry. As a leader of deadly penguins, however, Abe Lincoln is a killing machine. Endless nature documentaries may have given you the false impression that penguins are nature's docile, tuxedo-clad pals. If you're ever trapped in the arctic, you might try befriending one of them, hoping its downy fluff might keep you warm against the elements. One moment you're snuggling up to a loudly squawking bird, and the next, it has confused your nose for a fish and chomped the thing clean off.
Now, imagine that unsettling scene playing out a million times over. Dozens of penguins coming at you from every angle, while a man in an ominous stove-top hat looks on, laughing a bucolic laugh, and rubbing his tiny claws together menacingly. You struggle to recall the section of the Gettysburg Address that mentions murdering people with penguins, but before you can curse yourself for skipping so many high school history classes, the battle is over. The penguins stand victorious, Abe Lincoln looks on with fatherly pride, and opens his mouth to speak:
"The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here."