Welcome to Monday Matchup, where we select one random combination of cards included with the digital version of SUPERFIGHT to give you a small taste of the sort of ludicrous creatures you'll be arguing for and against. Today, we're highlighting a combination that seems adorable but can quickly prove deadly: Three Children Wearing An Overcoat, Riding A Pigeon, And Wielding Slothchuks.
Most dangers in SUPERFIGHT are fairly obvious. You're right to be wary of depressed Polar Bears and heavily-armed former Presidents. But sometimes, the most terrifying card combinations are also the most adorable.
Anyone who spent their formative years watching sitcoms will recognize that there are very few reasons why three children would pile on top of each other's shoulders and don an overcoat. Clearly they're trying to pass as a single, lumpy adult, but why? To get into an R-rated movie? To rent a carpet shampooer? No, the reality is much more sinister.
These youngsters have realized that by seemingly multiplying their size and age, not only will they intimidate their opponents, but they can also call on allies from the animal kingdom. The pigeon, usually too busy scavenging from dumpsters to bother with the affairs of humans, serves as a noble, flying steed, ferrying the kids anywhere in the world while raining down droppings like a disgusting B-52 bomber. See the blissful look on that sloth's face? The lil' fella is clearly having a blast as a living weapon! While a sloth's claws are most often used to pluck delicate leaves and strip bark from tropical trees, they're equally at home buried in the ruined flesh of anyone foolish enough to think, "Aw! I wanna pet the cute sloth!"